The Truth Behind the Smiles

I'm a firm believer than anyone can change their life if they are given the proper tools, support and most importantly, the desire to change their life for a better one.

With my blogs I send out messages of hope and inspirations to the world. I trully believe everyone has the right to enjoy all the good things life has to offer each and every one of us.

So I wanted to share this incredible story of a woman who fought back when she had nothing but hope and the will to change her life. Her name is Shirley, and she is my friend and this is her story.

When I read her testimony I was both moved and touch, never before have I read a story of such courage. I asked her if I could post it here and she gave me her permission. For anyone who believes that they can't change their life for a better one read this and you'll probably inspired that you can change it.

"The Truth Behind Sharing Smiles"

For a long time I had to be the person someone else wanted me to be...

The perfect wife, mother, lover, the back bone of the business. I could never just be me. Don’t get me wrong. I enjoy being a mother. I just never liked everything else being forced upon me.

My son’s have been so great throughout the whole ordeal and I praise them both for being so awesome. I know they had it rough growing up...

I turned to alcohol and prescription drugs for a long time to rid myself of all the pain I was enduring at a time I was slowly losing focus of the ones that mattered most to me, but I was good at hiding what I was feeling. So, at the time it was all good to me.

A few times I would find myself in the bathroom with a razor blade clinched between my fingers after being beaten so badly that I was unable to see out of one or both eyes, but Joe (the ex) knew there was only one thing he needed to do and that was have my babies stand by the door begging me to come out.

I remember hiding a bottle of Trazadone and a bottle of Absolut Vodka in the cabinet over the sink in the kitchen just waiting for the right moment to end it all.

At night I would slide my hand between the mattress to make sure my knife was where I left it in case I would ever need it.

The hardest part was waking in the morning and having to force a smile on my face.

One day while I was at work I saw a co-worker of mine seated there without a care in the world and I thought to myself why is he so peaceful? I just loved going to work and sitting there because the vibes were so full of great energy.

He never talked and I was fine with that. So I asked someone why he was the way he was. They replied “he is a Buddha man.” I laughed but I grew more curious as the days went by. So I decided to do some research on Buddhism and found myself traveling through the different religions and then, I cam across this book “Tao The Ching: Lao Tzu” and I started to read it. At the time I had no clue what I was reading but for some reason I couldn’t put it down. I’m glad I didn’t because of that one book I see things a lot more clearer.

I started to become a stronger woman as my appreciation for life grew as did everything around me.

My outlook on life started to change and I found myself smiling more and more and I noticed everyone around me started smiling too.


One day I went home and I told Joe it was over and that he was not above me or below me. HaHaHa. He looked back at me like I had lost my mind and started to laugh. I grabbed a few things and moved into the guest room and stopped talking to him. It was hard in the beginning but I kept going back to the many books I had started to read and that made it easier.

As time went on he began to see the change in me and realized that he no longer had any control over me. So, he tried it with the kids and it didn’t work. My boys – now adults, love him as a father but have a hard time liking him as a person.

I met Kaoru. Lets call him my inspirational guide. He has a beautiful soul and posts the most awesome blogs that I looked forward to reading on a daily basis. They always put a smile on my face and because of that I wanted to share it with everyone I came across.

I would go to work and give everyone a new challenge for the day... HaHaHa... They hated it, but I asked them to only do it if they thought it would brighten someone else’s day. I could always tell whom did it and who didn’t cause the one’s that did always came back with a smile.

Now being divorced... my biggest challenge is to not hate the man that harmed me but to thank the man that helped teach me to become a woman I am today. SO, THANK YOU JOE!!!

Now a days I live for today and look forward to tomorrow’s with no regrets... just smiles!!!

Remember to appreciate everyone and everything that surrounds you for that is the Tao.

I didn’t write this blog for pity or to vent. I wrote this blog to open the eye’s of everyone who reads this. This doesn’t even scratch the surface.

I want to thank you for taking the time to read this blog.

P.S. Men and Women and Children can be victims of abuse... that is not the way life should be live. So take this moment to look into your heart and find the place of love, harmony and peace. No person can do such wrong to be treated anything less than equal.

My thoughts and prayers are with you, Shirley. May you be well, happy, peaceful and prosperous.